| From our home offices in
Seattle ... |
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Plastic knees and hips means you
guys can save money on those annoying protective pads!
Sincerely, Joe Namath Zack
Henkle |
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At least four credit hours in
child psychology, so you will be able to relate to your No. 1
receiver. Joey
Bowen |
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Able to keep running total of Bill
Parcell's Chef Boyardee points. Jeff
Peshoff |
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God-given ability to throw a
football exactly six feet short of your intended target. Kevin
Wilson |
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Unlike Hoffa, you have to be able
to do your work at the Meadowlands from the topside of the
Astroturf. Steve
Shaffer |
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Be able to walk up and down the
sidelines cheering and clapping for Rick Mirer to keep his
emotional state stable on the field. Philip
Massey |
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Innate sense of failure. Justin
O'Connor |
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Ability to be LISTENING to
loud-mouth, trash-talking, always-open, never-my-fault, wide
receiver, without HEARING him. James
Stepien |
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Once voluntarily enlisted in a
"brain donor" program. Chris
Shinkle |
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And a free T-shirt goes to Ben
Specht for the No. 1 qualification to be a Jets backup
quarterback: |
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Warm blooded. Mammals preferred.
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